Is that a different one from the one that had "100 beautiful girls and three ugly ones" on its marquee? Were Seattle's great satirists mostly employed writing one-liners for strip clubs?
Also, in the same period of time there was a dry cleaners in Wallingford whose marquee read "Drop your pants and jacket off here" -- for about half a day, before they took it down. Presumably after shocked and offended neighbors complained.
That was what I was going to post, I remember laughing at that on the Lusty Lady's readerboard. Another great one they had was "Hindsight is twenty-five cents". Cheers -
A Lord Haw Haw reference, in 2026, from an American writing political comedy on the internet? I think Jeff must have been getting his column ideas from my Grandmother...
I remember a cracked article from like 20 years ago about life on a nuclear submarine. The best joke was that you didn't want to touch the walls of the shower because it was covered in the crusty semen of crusty seamen.
How much of the reaching for things to take down Platner comes from the pure shock that the party who brought you "OK signs are clear and undisputable proof of white supremacy" looks at a Nazi tattoo and goes, "well, who knows what that could mean?".
Can you imagine trying to do oppo research on this guy? You already basically shot him with a nuke, so now yea, you're throwing everything at him because who the fuck knows what these people will think is too much?
It's a really bad situation; I wish Janet Mills had been younger. The fact that Mainers are now forced to choose between this clown and a reasonable-seeming person who waves through eminently unreasonable stuff when the chips are down (e.g. RFK Jr. nomination) suggests that maybe there just aren't enough people in Maine.
What gives them the right to criticize our service members for releasing some tension?? I’ve stroked the salami in worse places for less; so, so much less.
My grandpa was a navigator for a bomber plane in World War II, and he got shot down over the North Sea. He swears that his first thought as his plane was crashing into the water was, "I don't want to die a virgin!" Fortunately some British ships were nearby and he did not die a virgin.
"Veni, vidi, veni."
--Julius Caesar
QUALITY.
Shamelessly copped from a 90s marquee at Seattle's long-departed gentlemen's spankatorium, the Lusty Lady.
Is that a different one from the one that had "100 beautiful girls and three ugly ones" on its marquee? Were Seattle's great satirists mostly employed writing one-liners for strip clubs?
That was across the street! So yes.
Also, in the same period of time there was a dry cleaners in Wallingford whose marquee read "Drop your pants and jacket off here" -- for about half a day, before they took it down. Presumably after shocked and offended neighbors complained.
I really miss Seattle sometimes.
This slogan appears to be associated with the Deja Vu chain, still in operation in both locations.
That was what I was going to post, I remember laughing at that on the Lusty Lady's readerboard. Another great one they had was "Hindsight is twenty-five cents". Cheers -
For Oscar's Night: "I'd like to spank the academy!"
Underrated.
Be honest: how much of this post was principle, and how much was a desire to make as many euphemisms and references to masturbation as possible?
0% and 100%.
High time someone did for masturbation what the Dead Parrot Sketch did for death.
Maybe I just like puns about sex but this was amazing 😆
A Lord Haw Haw reference, in 2026, from an American writing political comedy on the internet? I think Jeff must have been getting his column ideas from my Grandmother...
My median reader is 98.
(I enjoy history and I enjoy a good deep cut!)
If you continue on like this, next week will be a deep cut on Wallis Simpson! My Gran didn't like her much either...
Love this!
I remember a cracked article from like 20 years ago about life on a nuclear submarine. The best joke was that you didn't want to touch the walls of the shower because it was covered in the crusty semen of crusty seamen.
I've always wondered why there are so many public fountains?
This post is why I subscribe! Excellent!
If not for post-nut clarity, Eisenhower would have never been able to devise the perfect strategy to take Normandy.
Speaking of Yank, now I get the true meaning of lines 3-4 of George M. Cohan’s WWI anthem “Over There”:
Over there, over there,
Send the word, send the word, over there,
That the Yanks are coming, the Yanks are coming,
The drums rum-tumming everywhere.
I clicked the link* for the headline, but I stayed for the old-timey euphemisms for whacking off.
*Yeah, you thought I was gonna say "came" and open myself up to more euphemisms! Not today, boys and girls! Not today!
"besides language that would get a person banished to the Marianas Trench these days"
Hey, I'm not that judgmental!
How much of the reaching for things to take down Platner comes from the pure shock that the party who brought you "OK signs are clear and undisputable proof of white supremacy" looks at a Nazi tattoo and goes, "well, who knows what that could mean?".
Can you imagine trying to do oppo research on this guy? You already basically shot him with a nuke, so now yea, you're throwing everything at him because who the fuck knows what these people will think is too much?
It's a really bad situation; I wish Janet Mills had been younger. The fact that Mainers are now forced to choose between this clown and a reasonable-seeming person who waves through eminently unreasonable stuff when the chips are down (e.g. RFK Jr. nomination) suggests that maybe there just aren't enough people in Maine.
What gives them the right to criticize our service members for releasing some tension?? I’ve stroked the salami in worse places for less; so, so much less.
My grandpa was a navigator for a bomber plane in World War II, and he got shot down over the North Sea. He swears that his first thought as his plane was crashing into the water was, "I don't want to die a virgin!" Fortunately some British ships were nearby and he did not die a virgin.
The only filmmaker brave enough is Sergei Bodrov (Into the Mountains, 1996)
Surprised you have chamberlain on this list. You’re a techlib, don’t you view him as a degen race traitor?