19 Comments
User's avatar
Telenil's avatar

You have to admit: a guy was willingly nailed to a cross 2,000 years ago, and that was a turning point in human history. Imagine the impact we could have today with alloy rivets and a hydraulic hammer!

Jeff G's avatar

He got a lot of engagement tho

Erin E.'s avatar

I was thisclose to gluing my hand to the David's ween for climate migration but thanks for this. I'm rethinking my strategy.

Brent Nyitray's avatar

At a bare minimum, people should throw green beans and grilled cheese sandwiches at Andy Warhol's Campbell Soup Cans.

He would probably appreciate it

Samhain's avatar

I expect Banksy to take this to the next level...

Jeremy's Iron's avatar

I can scarcely imagine the heights of human progress we can achieve when several activists go full Human Centipede and affix a chain of themselves to the Sistine Chapel.

Cathy's avatar

OMG this was so funny. But seriously....back in the day kids who wanted to change working conditions in factories had to literally sew themselves to the artwork in the museums, it took hours but they didn't have a choice. I'm printing this so when my children grow up they'll know who to *really* thank for saving the planet.

Zeke's avatar

Flawless. Also armless.

Philip Vitale's avatar

Who paid for the climate warriors to get into these museums? Obviously they don't or can't work and have no money because any job could cause an additional carbon footprint. So blame their Poppas.

Mike's avatar

I expect that the face-gluing milquetoasts (kudos for that one Jeff) will read this, see the error of their ways and immediately look for opportunities for their nethers.

Actually i said that tongue in cheek but I’ve just realised that people stupid enough to glue their faces to beautiful works of art would probably take you seriously. After all they were obviously inspired by someone else’s face-gluing, so they’re clearly very suggestible.

Yikes!

Arm venus’ guards so they can guard her arms! Wait…

Jeff G's avatar

Venus de Milo: she may not have arms but she sure has balls

Steven Greene's avatar

Sitting in here in my office literally laughing out loud reading this. The political commentary Maurer was born to make.

IAmAwesome's avatar

Real change requires real action

Deb Leamy's avatar

Made my day. Thank you Jeff!

Lucidamente's avatar

Fantastic, but why didn’t you mention that the Clean Water Act got passed because Ed Muskie fastened his junk to the Pantheon in Rome?

Jeff G's avatar

No wonder he was crying